SOME FOOD REVIEWS (this is Melbourne after all!)

LA PETITE FRANCAISE - CREPERIE ET CAFE (that's yer actual french)
307 Toorak Road, Sth Yarra.

Everso slightly creped out......

4 out of 5 stars

Finally! This was a miracle find; the laws that govern eating out for us poor punters normally err on the side of mine hosts and we invariably exit falling somewhere between sensations of nausea and/or being slightly or mightily ripped off.
But not this time, so yay for us!
We did venture inside this little cafe with boundless trepidation but decided to fore go our exploration of Chapel Street and take a punt on our gut-feeling and hoped our guts wouldn't get punished too severely. As luck would have it the coffee was great and the crepes were astonishingly good!
The fillings were superb, cooked deftly and with care. For the record I had 'Popeye' which I heartily recommend again to myself one day, and Mrs B had plain crepes with lemon. Both dishes served with the coffee (I know, it seems so silly to write that) and within a few short minutes of our order.
Why can't life always be like this?


FITZPIZZA
450-452 Nicholson Street, North Fitzroy

Always wondered where leftover pizza ends up.....

This place is not for the faint of heart: if you love your pizza base thick and tomatoey and topped with scraps from assorted garbage bins then this is most definitely the place to eat!
I'm not a huge fan of takeaway pizza - save for those brilliant slices served up in Rome - but if ever I needed an excuse to be excused from ever trying one again, then Fitzpizza handed me one, or two, on a plate (actually, served in a pizza box).
I ordered 'Morroccan Lamb' and expected, err..Moroccan Lamb, but what i got was this: pizza base freely schmeered with thick tomato sauce, topped with unidentifiable cheese, at least 3 cm thick, followed by some scraps from some random bins and topped with bits of inedible and alarmingly greyish 'meat' which may have been lamb but could have been last weeks roast beef.
Second pizza ordered was the 'Pecorino' which was: pizza base freely schmeered with thick tomato, topped with 6 cm of cardboard impression of cheese (well drawn I thought) followed by the contents of someones bin.
Expect food poisoning.


GROSSE FLORENTINO - CELLAR BAR
Bourke Street, City.

Hopefully, the dining room is better....

Love this place: wonderful ambiance, like being anywhere in Italy, waiters with attitude but everso attentive and an atmosphere which is slightly, but not alarmingly, snobbish. Being dressed in a suit helps I think. In this, I could be rich - who could tell?
Unfortunately, the meal did not live up to either expectation or reviews: spaghetti bolognaise was adequate (just) - this is one dish that defines many restaurants in my eyes - and the lasagne fairly bland.
A disappointment.