MY $6 FILM FESTIVAL...........

When we arrived in Melbourne last year, the International Film Festival was underway. Ticket prices were ridiculous, so I took advantage of Carlton's Nova Cinema $6 Mondays and treated myself to a 2 month binge of film festivalling of my own making.

Here are a few I saw:

YOU, THE LIVING (Sweden)

1 out of 5 stars

The unbearable lightness of boring......

Forgoing my film mantra - no swedish films shall pass thine eyes - I took myself off to catch this cinematic voyage on the recommendation of almost every critic I could lay my hands on.
To the former, I wish I hadn't and to the latter I wish I really had.
Here are some words that best describe my feelings to this film:
Pseud - unfunny - dull - swedish - cliched - turgid - wasted a perfectly good $6 note.
New note to self: imprint first sentence onto brain.



THE BANK JOB (UK)

0 out of 5 stars

Cor blimey guv, its the old bill.......

Having all but pulverised any remaining fillings through copious teeth grinding during this lame 'boys-own' adventure, and all within the first 20 minutes, it occurred to me that I may have missed the point. This film's title and synopsis, masquerading as a 'real-life' story, was actually a clever misnomer for the long overdue theatrical release of 'Minder' but without the clever script and the understated acting of Waterman and Cole in the guise of Terry and Arthur. And then it occurred to me that perhaps it wasn't; this was actually a theatrical version of 'Life on Mars' but without the clever and witty script, attention to 70's detail and understated but believable characterisation. Then again, maybe not. Perhaps this was actually another Carry On film but with serious intentions.
Then I got bored with my mind games and instead focused on the real mission I had set myself: sit through the excrement and get some worth for my money; suspend disbelief and go along for the ride. Or be taken for a ride.
Drivel.


THE EDGE OF HEAVEN (Turkey/Germany)

5 out of 5 stars

Strap yourself in.......

At some point in your cinematic experience there comes a film that simply wraps itself around you and takes you to places uninvited and unexpected. This is one of those experiences.
Absorbing and gut-wrenching, I couldn't help but wonder why there was such little fanfare for this gem. I can find little evidence of it making the slightest of blips on the critics' radar and wonder how many have missed this brilliant piece because of that.
My film of the year.


THE BAND'S VISIT (Israel/Egypt)

3 out of 5 stars

A very nice, gentle film. Unheralded around the world and with limited release here in Oz. Such a shame.


KATE BUSH:UNDER REVIEW

Minus 10 out of 5 stars

Wow...unbelievable

I added this film into my list to get back at the organisers of the Melbourne Film Festival. A ridiculous amount of money ($25) for a 'made for tv' doco that was so poorly made and so far up its own arsehole it beggared belief that any right thinking film buff actually believed it good enough to be part of a film festival.
I wont waste too much time reviewing this tripe, except to say that anyone who recalls Kenny Everett's (and, come to think about it, Kate Bush's) take on the phenomenal rise and rise of Kate Bush way back in the late 70's will completely understand where I'm coming from.
The only reason I gave the film minus 10 is because the festival screened a Patti Smith short music film on the same programme; the song was amazing (Smells Like Teen Spirit) but the close-ups were truly scary.
Sorry Patti!


IN BRUGES (UK)

2 out of 5 stars

The beer's not bad either...

Cannot recall ever seeing a film where all the action is based anywhere in Belgium! I still don't have any inclination to ever visit Bruges after seeing this film even though it certainly looks like a very interesting place to visit.
I hate violence, so I watched most of the film through squinty eyes. Stupidly, I should add, because the violent scenes announced themselves well in advance. Also, I'm not even sure if I was supposed to take the film seriously or not and therein lay the difficulty.
A good film that could have been a whole lot better.


THE SALUTE (Australian)

2 out of 5 stars

Disgraceful treatment dished out over the years to an Aussie hero. This doco lays bare the utter hypocrisy of the Olympic spirit.
Quite welll made, but the interviews became irritating at times andf the story tended to jump around a fair bit.
Glad I made the effort to see it though.